Courage please...

-

 Are historians naturally depressed because they live in the past? I am told that I live in the past and what's funny is that since it's been pointed out, I see it.  Often I think back to what was and just how different things have become.  Time has gone by and part of me says there is so much more to accomplish though there is a small part of me that see's myself as I will always be.  I'm unsure why that is; lack of courage I presume.  

I'd like to have more courage.  Right now I'm super insecure because of my tooth or lack there of.  It's very embarrassing.  When a customer comes in I like to smile and say hello though when I do their eyes go right to my mouth.  If I smile a little bit, like a grin, barely showing my teeth it's not noticeable.  Then I smile naturally and I'm all teeth and that rotten spot is smack dab in the middle.  I'm going to have a root canal done.  I've never have one and am very nervous.  Please don't let me hear or feel anything.

One of these days I'm going to have the things I desire. I deserve it and I'm worth it. It brings me pure joy to sit here at this moment, typing up and expressing with you these things that cross my mind.  Thank you to anyone who takes interest in this blog.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I've gotta get it out somehow...

-
  The idea I've had for this blog is one that I've been procrastinating on for too long.  Originally I wanted a place to go, as a mother, to vent and talk shit about everything and anything that is weighing me down or causing me to be irritable.  Currently, life has been more of a struggle and I'm aggravated.  I don't like that I have no patience or that I can't seem to show my gratitude or love to anyone, not even my kids. I wanted a place to let some of the thoughts, memories, and feelings out from the pit of my stomach. Though, I must warn you, I am vulgar and have the tendency to unintentionally hurt feelings. Please forgive me ahead of time because even though I am pretty smart, I don't know everything so I'm always seeking a lesson in every aspect of my life. Every single situation, big or small, is one that I analyze. When there isn't an outcome that I could possibly think of and someone opens my mind to one, I get truly amazed and thankful.  With
Read more

Thankful for the little things.. (bc they're not so little)

-
A few years ago I learned a great way to teach myself all I'm grateful for is to write down 3 things I'm thankful for.  Yes, my 3 kids, always though I'm talking about the little things.  Things we tend to forget or let go of in passing the days away. There are so many fortunate moments for each and every one of us that go unrecognized because paying attention to them has never been influenced. Kids need to know that their life is never promised and neither are their parents.  Sometimes when it seems life has been so unfair it turns out that it's lead us exactly where we need to be. Losing someone or a good thing ending can really run a toll on one person and forget about it if they're responsible for the safety and well being of a child or children. It may seem pretty far fetched and down right stupid though whatever we lose; whoever we lose, it teaches us.  "Our loss is another's rejoice" was the quote at the top of a drawing that displayed a person
Read more

More than Rural

-
Days like today I sit and wonder if New York officials get together and make up ways to fuck their people just to reap that money.  They've got to realize that New York is not all city. I personally live in a very rural area that doesn't have a transportation line.  There are no busses, no taxi's, no Uber's, no trains, or planes. Also there are no stores in walking distance to buy healthy food that is actually good for you and prevents disease and illness of all sorts. The closest store that still isn't in walking distance is a Dollar General and you've got to know that food isn't healthy and is probably the reason why most of America is sick.  Almost every kid has ADHD and it's becoming more and more common in adults.  Why? Take a look at the generations and what life was like when each was young.  There was a time when folks planted and grew their own food.  People raised their own cows, pigs, and chickens with intentions to feed their families.  As ti
Read more